Waiting for Silence in the Silence...

You would think that this post's title says it all...and it does, but only in the most simplistic terms.

At this point I have gained no new insights on my current area of focus: Prayer.  And I still have over a month to continue my focus on this topic.

But I continue to follow through on this part of my life, because I don't want to stop short of learning how to better communicate and adore God.  I continue to wait in hope that I can uncover what the Lord is trying to tell me.  I do think this is very appropriate timing, as we are in the thick of advent...the season of Hope.

Unfortunately, I'm not the best at persevering when I see little or no progress or reward.  I want to know that what I am doing, by waiting, will create a better faith life and closer relationship with Jesus. 

At this point, I'm not sure if this challenge will help or is a total waste of my time. 

Am I praying the right way? Am I supposed to be doing this challenge at all?  Is this really what God wants me to do? 

All this questions and doubts are continually flowing in my head as I try to pray.  It's enough to drive a girl mad. And I know why....I'm seeking silence and when my head is in constant motion, I can seem to connect with Him as I'd like (and I'm sure as the Lord would like as well).

During the rush to get everything done and ready for Christmas and New Years,  silence is hard to come by.  This makes me feel especially blessed to have my committed hour in adoration, but sad that I feel it sometimes is not enough time to really calm my brain and really find Jesus and hear what He wants to tell me.



Do I need to run away to a monastery to hear the Lord in silence?
Feels that way sometimes.

Then again, this reminds me of what Matthew Kelly says about finding a routine within my prayer routine.  Perhaps finding some sort of routine would help me quiet myself during the hour and help me to claim my focus on praying.  A rosary...a chaplet... a psalm...hmmm something to further ponder and experiment with.  Although I'm not sure that during this time of year with any routine, that I will be easily focused, but it's worth a shot.